Monday, June 15, 2015

Final Post

Well as this is my last email from the grand country of Chile, it will be a long one.
This experience has been one of the most enriching and satisfying moments of my life. I have learned who I am, where I am going and how I am going to get there. I know that this mission has prepared me for the eternities and I don't want you all to worry that I will adjust badly to real life. I won't. I know I won't. I made a decision a long time ago to not let my mind get out of my own control. I know what I need to do.
I was able to have an amazing experience this past week that will forever mark my life. My converts from my first sector in the mission L. and S., got sealed in the temple for time and all eternity. I was blessed enough to get to the temple in time to see them go through a session and get sealed. I have never felt the spirit so strongly. When they saw me in the celestial room S. (who is deaf) yelled "HERMANA FARNER!" (in the silent celestial room) and he rushed over to hug me (which I had to reject) and just was SO happy to see me. Along with L. that said "May God be blessed for giving us the opportunity to have you here with us as we take this final step" I was so filled with gratitude. This was the greatest experience of my mission. The people I found the very first day of my mission. Getting sealed the last full week. Nothing better :)
As I reflected on this moment in my personal study the next day, I realized something very special. When S. and L. were to be baptized I was changed to El Monte so I couldn't assist. I had decided to really dedicate myself to El Monte because I was having a hard time forgetting my first sector. It was a Saturday when I decided to forget the old and start taking out the trash. But that day the Assistants to the President called me and said I had permission to make the hour and a half trip to see them get baptized. I was TORN. How could I miss the baptism? But how could I go back on my decision to dedicate myself to the work? I went and prayed and felt that I needed to stay. And even though it hurt and I didn't know why, I did it. And that is the day when we had an insane amount of lessons for our time. And that is when the miracle of El Monte started. 
At that time I thought that the blessing for missing the baptism of my Chilean grandparents were the miracles that I saw in El Monte and the rest of my mission. But as I have been reflecting I see that God was preparing me for blessings that were even bigger. 
When I felt the need to extend my mission, it was something I did because I felt like I need to. I knew it was a sacrifice, that it would be hard on not just me but on my family and loved ones. But I felt it strongly and if I have learned anything on my mission it is to follow what God says without asking why. 
I can see clearly now what the Lord was doing all along. Preparing me slowly and surely to see the miracles that come from heart-filled sacrifice and obedience to the Lord and His commandments. He blessed me so much in my missed and He had planned all along this AMAZING moment to see my converts be sealed in the temple. 
I am grateful that I was blindly obedient. I am grateful I never complained. I am grateful that I was faithful. I am grateful that I took what came and did all I could to please the Lord. I am grateful I never gave up. I am grateful that I was happy my ENTIRE mission. I can honestly say that I was happy my entire mission. There were moments of trials but I never fell all the way because the Lord was there. As Gordon B Hinckley says "He reached down to life me up..... my gratitude has no bounds and my thanks has no conclusion". He loves me so much. I can't even fathom it. I am so grateful I extended my mission. That I didn't think too much but rather acted. I am grateful I didn't try to please the crowd, but honor my God.
Although I wasn't able to serve as a true blue through and through missionary in this last month, I have been so spiritually nurtured and strengthened. I have seen the Lord´s hand work in my life and I bind my words with the words of Spencer W. Kimball that after this life "I shall not know any better than I know now that He is the Son of God". 
I have come to know the Savior, I have felt His love, I have seen His hand in my life, I have felt His comfort, I have been lifted by His sacrifice.
Thank you for letting me stay here. I needed to be here just a titch longer to really understand why I came.
I will miss this country. It has become holy ground. A promised land and a jar of memories that I pray will never fade. I came here someone completely different and leave a lot closer to being what the Lord desires me to be.
I plan to continue with the flight of the eagle as the temple presidency of the Chile temple put it. I wasn't just sent to the mission, but to the earth, to make waves.
Hermana Farner
Chile Santiago BEST

1 comment:

  1. SO BEUTIFUL blog. I been called to serve in the same mission, your experiences look so fantastic. Why did they changed your mission? I have never heard about that, lots of regards from Chile :)