I AM IN CHILE!!

I am in Chile! Safe and sound! I had some rough times with money and the 160 dollar fee. Rough life, had to pay cash and barely had enough. Had to beg her to take a slightly bent bill. I am super super tired and really scared. I am slightly on the verge of tears, and have been simply because I am so tired!

 

I am at the Chile CCM right now and will be here until tomorrow. President Barrieros wanted all his missionaries to come together from the CCM. Which means I have to have another in field orientation. I swear it takes so long for me to actually get to the mission part of the mission! Super frustrating!  But whatever.  I met some girls that knew Jillian here so it was cool to talk to them.

I miss my friends from the CCM in Mexico and I miss Mexico too. I got really lonely and homesick but it will pass hopefully. Chile is gorgeous. I am going to be so happy once I get some sleep. I got here at 7 this morning after flying through the night with no sleep. I can barely keep my eyes open! .

Sorry I couldn´t call. It just would not work for me. Lame right? Whatever, I will talk to you on Mother's day, it isn't too far away. Love and miss you mucho!

Con amor,

Hermana Farner

My Kindness Shall Not Depart From Thee

Hello Everyone!

 

So today is Christmas and I only have a half hour to write all the feelings of my heart to my dear friends and especially family back home! People always seem to think that Christmas in the MTC or CCM would be terrible but I am having the best Christmas of my life out here! It is true that I miss my family and seeing those familiar faces back home, but there is something special about being out here and seeing tons of people in the same stage of life as I am, all doing our best to represent Christ every day, and when Christmas finally comes around it is like when your favorite band is in town and you have tickets to the concert! You are just so stoked! I have been grinning and smiling all day.

Mani and I got up super early this morning and we had made those giant 3D snowflakes earlier in the week and we had 10 big ones and 10 small ones that we taped and stapled together and then we went to our classroom and after some stealthy stealing of some poinsettia plants we decorated the classroom for our elders. We took some really good pictures that I will send if I have time today, but if not they will come before I leave. Then we made little envelopes out of notecards and wrote one word that best described each of our Elders and then put those words in the little envelopes and put them on leaves on their chairs and decorated the windows and whiteboard with a poem and stuff. Mom you would have been really, really proud haha :) I didn´t know I was so crafty until I was pulling out a white sheet from the bedding closet and using it as a tablecloth. It was a great, great morning. Christ is so apparent in every aspect of life.

For Monday I did my laundry and it was hanging out on the line to dry and I was eating at the Comedor and I realized that I had forgotten my nametag, so I ran back to the Casa and while I was running I got this feeling that I should take in my laundry and I didn´t think that I had any time to do so, but I just did it anyway! And I kid you not 10 minutes later it was down pouring rain like I've never seen. If I had left it there, I would have had no sheets to sleep on that night! He is just so thoughtful you know?

Well that is Christmas here. This last week has flown by. It is so bittersweet. The relationships that I have made out here are so precious and I don´t like to think of the possibility of never seeing these people I regard as my family ever again. I love them! My district is worth waking up at 4:30 in the morning to have a surprise Christmas ready for.

 

Last Sunday there were all of these devotionals on the importance of committing ourselves wholly to the Lord and doing His work. Now me and Elder T had a really, really deep convo about 2 days before this on what we sacrificed to come out on missions. Let's just say that I had to sacrifice hardly anything to get out here. There was nothing holding me back. Tuck on the other hand sacrificed a whole lot. We sat and cried and talked about it for probably a couple of hours. Then this guy Elder C (he is the leader of something here) gave probably one of the best devotionals of my life all about EXACTLY what me and Elder T talked about. The whole time I was taking notes my mind was being blown and afterwards me and Elder T ran to each other and were like "DUDE WHAT!" It was so cool. Then we just talked all about everything again.  Elder C compared the importance of dedicating our whole selves to the story of Lot´s wife. It is Genesis 19:26 I do believe. Read it and think about what you have in your life that you stare back longingly at. There are a lot of things that seem to be there for me. But I am noticing a gradual change in my nature. I can see a little clearer, feel a little more purely, love a little more genuinely, care a little more about everything in general. My heart is finally starting to soften. I hope I can remain following my Savior and being happy like I am here. Have you listened to that song yet? My Kindness Shall Not Depart From Thee? If you haven´t do it right now because it is awesome, then read D&C 122:8-9 and 3 Nephi 22:10. Mind blown once again. Overall that was SUCH a good Sunday and there was no crying because no one left for the field.

One of the Elders here wanted to go home and the CCM president even called home to arrange it, but he ended up staying because his dad told him not to come home.

WE HAD HAMBURGERS!!! It was probably the worst and best burger of my life. Still no guacamole here. I drank salsa. I have it on everything. I get the hottest stuff and put it on literally all my food. I had salsa on my pizza last night. It was so good.

We also have a devil cat the chases us in the mornings. Super frightening. It also meows outside my window at night.

I think I am probably going to write you a letter about all the spiritual things that I am learning. I am just so young and fresh when it comes to anything gospel related. I have loved my time in the CCM and love the fact that I get to serve my Lord. I am learning little by little each day, and I am beginning to see how that is the way God works with all His children, even the great prophets. Reread the story of Alma the Younger and you will see his gradual growth throughout life. I love the guy. He is one of those that I want to meet in heaven. Easily.

Love you all! I want you to know that I know without a doubt that this Gospel is true and can change lives. It has changed mine. I cannot think of anywhere else I would rather be than on a mission. I have felt more emotion in my time in the CCM than I have felt in my life and have gained a huge testimony of 2 Nephi 2 and Ether 12. I can't wait for everything that I will learn and experience in Chile. I miss you family!

 Love,

Mani Farner

I CAN'T WAIT TO GO TEACH!

Hey Mom and Dad and everyone else!

Another sad Sunday as the last district in our zone left. Elder N and Elder I and their district left. Me and my companion went and had a sleepover at Herman G and Hermana L's casa. It was super, super fun. I loved it. They are both heading back to the states.

 

Tell Sister Hardy congrats about her new calling. I know she will be phenomenal. Tell her to teach the kids to liken the scriptures to their life! It is really essential in the mission field. So many people don't know how to make the stories apply to their lives and then to the lives of the investigators. It is so special when you can get that to happen though. That’s what me and my companion have been trying to do. We wanted to make it so our fake investigator could really apply the Book of Mormon of Mormon to their lives because if there is no Book of Mormon there is no iglesia.

Dad if you can, get the missionaries to find AP and teach him Alma 32. I was pretending to be him as an investigator and I just got this feeling that he really needed to hear about faith. So please be my hands in Washington and find him!

On one of my days in the special book I got a really, really helpful scripture, each day they always bring me up, but Grandma Farner, thank you for putting in 2 Nephi 25:26. It really helped me that day and made me miss you! Love you loads!

Sunday we had some bomb lessons about the Atonement and Prayer. Tad R. Callister's book about the Atonement is one that I really, really want to read. It made me realize how all-encompassing the Atonement is. I loved it. Then Elder S gave a devotional on prayer and my testimony was just that much more strengthened on the topic of prayer.

I was able to go to the temple today too and sit in the celestial room and just think about stuff. I have been crying a lot. The mission is hard. But I realized that there is no way this couldn´t be true because even though I am super frustrated and let down and sometimes even mad that I can´t seem to measure up, at my core, I am still happy. Just purely simply joyful at my core. All these things that are hard for me on the outside don´t even matter because deep down I am smiling and I know that all my trials are making me into the person that I am supposed to be and that my Heavenly Father wants me to be.

I have thought a ton about how important a change of heart is in life. I think that is why in the Book of Mormon it talks so much about getting your heart softened. It is like clay, when your heart is soft, it can change and you can make it into something better. A softening of the heart is the precursor to a change of heart ALWAYS. I mean just look at Alma the Younger. He is one of those that I want to meet in the afterlife. I want to sit and just stare at him and ask him how he did it. I LOVE Alma 36. Especialmente versiculo 24. The beginning just gets me every time.

However, I learned mostly this week that if you have a change of heart once, it doesn´t mean that it is never going to happen again, in fact it should be constantly changing for the better. That is something that I want desperately in my life. I don't want to go home as the same person.  I personally need to change my heart and change myself if I ever hope to be an effective tool in the hand of the Lord like the sons of Mosiah were (Alma 17). I just have been blown away at how stubborn I am. I pray daily to have the ability to soften my heart. I don't want to waste this time out in the field.

I really, really don't ever want to come home. If I could stay with the people of Chile for 14 years, I would. If that is what God called me to do, I would gladly do it. There is no greater work, there is no greater call than to be a missionary in these the last days. The more I hear it from my maestros, los apostoles, el profeta, los lideres tambien the more I believe it and know it to be true. I love it out here.

For Nairne! My pal Elder B, he totally wears PF Flyers.

We had a special Christmas Nativity dancing program Mexican style. It was so great I loved it. We were all yelling and screaming because they were doing all these cultural dances. Elder C kept leaning over and asking me what was going on. He was so lost. But it was soooooo good! All the girls were wearing these super cool Spanish dresses. I loved it. I needed to yell some, people here are way too quiet.

I am beginning to love Spanish a lot more. But I am so white. When we leave the CCM people just STARE at me. It’s like I am the plague. It will be an adjustment in the field that is for sure. I CAN¨T WAIT TO GO TEACH!

 

Love and miss you all!

Love,

Hermana Farner

I am a Giant

My camera is still jacked up but Hermana Mc let me borrow hers and I just put my memory card in it.

We had a super good Sunday. We had another lesson on faith in Relief Society which was legit. All of our lessons on faith have really helped me a lot. This one was about Nephi building his ship and Hermana P related it to our lives and house we are building our mission ships. How in the CCM we have the ore to build tools to use in the mission to create our ships. It was pretty good.

Then we had a pretty sweet devotional by Elder Holland. He is a really powerful speaker and scares me a little in a good way. He talked about some of the greatest missionaries in our time and one of them was Addison Pratt. Basically that is who you named Addison after because we all know she is going to be an awesome missionary.

Then this week was a little tough because one of districts in our zone left and Sunday night was the last time we saw them. Also another district I got tight with from another zone left which made it doubly hard. I was so sad when we sang ‘God be with you til we Meet again.’  I looked over at my buddies from VB and all the good times we had and I lost it. I have never cried so hard in my life. It is amazing to see how close a group of people can become when we are all united in the same purpose and are together for just a couple of weeks. I miss them a lot. Especially Elder L, he was way too awesome. I wish I could have got a picture for all of you! He is pretty cool. 

Last week on Pday I played 6 hours of volleyball. My body feels like it is still playing high school basketball and my knees look like it too.

When you are in the MTC you start to see what your weaknesses are. I have gained a ton of strength from Ether 12:27, prayer has become such an integral part of my life it is ridiculous. God is literally the only person that I can talk to that I know for a fact is listening and actually cares about what I have to say here. It is one of the greatest things that I could receive but I still feel lonely at times because even though I can feel his comfort and love, there are so many distractions that I feel like sometimes I miss it unless I have my own special place to be alone. Which only happens when Hermana is asleep because I have to be with her 24/7. I take back all the times that I told Brother Knopf that being with someone all day everyday would be easy. It is one of my biggest challenges here. But I know that if I ask God, he will give me strength to achieve as long as I do what I need to.

We had a challenge to read a chapter in the BOM and pray to see if it is true. I chose to read Alma 5 and I got an answer that it is the word of God. Right before I was having difficulties with some of the elders and hermanas. Then I knew why I had chosen that chapter, or rather God had inspired me to read that chapter and gain a testimony of it because it is all about having a change of heart. I know that in order to repent or get better, a change of heart is required. I think that is why they call it in the scriptures as a softened heart, because it is changeable and will always be that way. There is no end to what we go through until we see God again, so changes within us have to keep happening every day in order to get closer to God.

Jean Rhinehart. Thank you so much for my temple journal. I have been using it as my main journal here. I only have a couple pages left. But it has been such an inspiration and also has been one of the coolest spiritual experiences ever. At the bottom of each page there is scripture and it always corresponds with what I am dealing with every day. Me and Elder T just sit and marvel at it sometimes. It is so cool. So thank you so much!!

Look up the song "My Kindness Shall Not Depart From Thee". It is one of the favorites in the district. Especially Elder T's. He sings it all the time. It is so awesome.

Also I really like canteloupe and super-hot salsa now.

We had a rock paper scissors tournament and I was seeded number 2 when we went to challenge the other district and stinking Elder N beat me in an upset in the first round. I was so mad.

Back to faith real fast, Dad said one of my greatest assets in the mission field was my knowledge of the scriptures, I somewhat agree and somewhat don´t. There is a strange balance and dichotomy between faith and knowledge. I feel like everything in the Gospel to me has been so knowledge based that I lost some of the wonder that faith brings to our lives. One of the girls here talked about this thing in Ether 2 and 3 that says that we sometimes we are like the Brother of Jared and are camped on the beach looking at the sea, but won't take that leap of faith into the water and go for it. I need to that, just have faith. Man I love faith. I am learning so much about it. If you can, just study what faith really is. It will blow your mind.

I also learned how to teach the BOM with Elder C. One of the best experiences ever. It was just like talking with Nairne. I can’t really explain why I liked it so much but we really bonded over it and I love teaching investigators about the Book of Mormon now.

Elder A secretly left me a bueno bar on my desk. It was the nicest thing ever. I made Elder B tell me who it was or else it would have been completely anonymous. Remind me to tell you about his conversion story. So cool.

All in all. Hard but amazing week. I have never cried so hard in my life, I sat in a chair, stared at a wall and cried for hours when those elders left, but I have never been so happy in my life. Sometimes I just sit and smile at my life and how blessed I am to be a representative of Jesus Christ. I can't wait to talk to you guys, SO MUCH I WANT TO SAY!

Last thing, I am a giant here. Seriously, everywhere I go I am so much taller than all the people and whiter and have longer hair. I feel like Addison! Here is a pic of me and Hermana with the roommates. It’s hilarious. I think that is everything.

Ether 12:27 and 1 Nephi 16. :)

Perfectionism is impossible

This past week flew by, but so much stuff happened too. Thanksgiving was really good! They made a whole bunch of food for us, not nearly as good as home though.

So first off my district is legitimately awesome. We are all super tight and the Hawaiians are so much fun. Elder A´s birthday was yesterday and we sang to him. WE ALWAYS SING. It is my favorite, we just bust out into some sweet harmonies every five minutes.

We play volleyball every single day. I love it. The zone elders talk call me baller and think I am really good. It is really, really fun. Probably the best thing ever. I have so much fun. But the studying is hard to do. There is so much to study that sometimes I get really nervous that I am not studying the right things. But there is some good stuff that I am learning. Especially about prayer. Sister Openshaw was so right when she said that I would learn to pray so desperately and so long and try so hard to communicate with my Heavenly Father but still feel so alone but comforted at the same time. I feel sometimes like I haven't grown at all, but I am trying really hard to improve every day and not get caught up on not being perfect. Perfectionism is impossible in the mission field and also very detrimental so I am trying to focus on being obedient and not trying to run faster than I have strength. I can´t believe I am on my third week though. It is crazy.

Spanish is fine. It is not too difficult at the moment because I can understand everything that is said to me with pretty apt clarity but I just can't say much back except in lessons. We met with this one member named Hermana L who has an inactive friend. I was able to communicate with her completely fluently about what we wanted her to do to better help her friend return to the church. Things like that make me super excited to get out and serve. I think the CCM is just the beginning of Doctrine and Covenants 84:85. I just have to treasure up all the words of life and then I will know what to say once I get to Chile. Both my morning and night teachers served in Puebla Mexico! Weird right? I told them about Elder Farner. I still have to write that little son of a gun. I miss him a lot. Elder C reminds me a ton of Nairne. He is kind of a mix between Nairne and Hollan so he is my favorite elder in the district. Then Elder T is serving  in the same mission as McKayla! I told him to find her.

We have had some super sweet devotionals. My notebook is pretty full. Kind of ridiculous. Luckily I have another one! But I am really having a good time but this is really, really hard. I don't miss much about home, but sometimes at the end of the day I am a little disappointed in the progress I have made because my companion and I get distracted. So I just pray really, really hard for a long, long time to gain strength and patience. It is getting easier even though the situations are getting harder, which is a strong testimony to me that my Heavenly Father is providing for me.

There are these things called bueno bars here that are sooo good. I wait until Elder La goes the tienda and then I follow him around until he offers me a piece. They are like heaven. Chocolate and creme inside kind of a kit kat bar. My hermanas de cuarto Hermana B and Hermana Mc are literally the best. I love making Mc laugh and T. Both of them have the funniest laughs ever. I even made our Latina roommates and my Spanish teachers laugh. I tried to tell my night teacher Hermano S a knock knock joke in Spanish..... but it didn´t work. But sarcasm does exist! I asked!

Dad the computers here are not apple. Just thought I would let you know. There is a kid here that looks EXACTLY like David M but with blonde hair. His name is Elder R and he is going to Texas Fort Worth mission. There are also parrots here which is super fun! Love it! But I got pooped on twice in one day by birds. Ridiculous. There are a bunch of grackels here too.

The mornings here are really, really cold and by the afternoon it is warm again. My hair has already gotten so much lighter and my face is actually a little darker too. It is because of all the beach volleyball. I bore my testimony in Spanish on fast Sunday, it was really cool because I can feel the spirit here every day, and I want to get a stronger testimony. Hermana Pratt (Presidente Pratt´s wife. And also Presidente´s great great great grandfather was Parley P. Pratt) gave a lesson on faith and the brother of Jared. It was a super cool lesson and made me reevaluate my faith.

Sometimes I wish Nairne was here. Well most of the time. I miss him a lot more now that I am out here than when I was home. I miss all of you a lot.  Anyway I am trying to think of what else I can tell you! Oh yeah so packages take like three weeks to get here, but if you can send one for the district that would be waaayyyy toooo coool.  I Love all of you so much and sorry if my emails are lame. I just don´t know what to write because SO MUCH HAPPENS. I will try and record better and tell you more in detail. Just know that it is flying by! Adios mi familia Les amo mucho!

Love,

 Hermana Farner

 

P.s. write me some letters! No one in our district gets mail!