Monday, April 21, 2014

Never Give Up

What did I learn this week?  Never give up. When you are tired, when your body hurts, when you can't eat anymore rice and chicken, when it's hot and cold and hot and cold again during the day, when the investigators don't capture the idea of the sacerdocio being restored, just don't give up. I have never been so angry, happy, sad, in good humor, and depressed in any time of my life than in the mission. Seriously, I am dying out here but loving it..... the weirdest sensation.

I recently completed 5 months in the mission, let me tell you I remember like it was yesterday when I arrived. I am sitting next to the Elder that picked me up from the airport, he goes home in 2 changes with my zone leaders. My first companion leaves in 4 changes, la M. in Enero. The mission is soooooooooooooooooo fast. I can't even explain how fast it is. It seems like every other week we are showing up to a reunion de cambios and everyone is being moved, can't even explain it. Mind is blowwwnnn all the time.
 
I recently finished the Book of Mormon in English and am now leaving all my English books in my suitcase and going full blown Spanish, I have never wanted something more in my whole life, to speak and understand like a native. I just want to be latin and speak in Spanish. Everyone can understand me, but I don't like that. The perfectionist inside of me is coming out. I just want to talk like I have lived Chile for 6 years and that is where the heavenly gift of patience comes out. Oh, that lovely gift. Patience.
What is patience you may ask? Well, it is when we know that everything will turn out for the better, and we trust in God enough to let it happen according to His plan.
What the heck does that even mean? I am obviously the most impatient person in this planet because I physically feel pain when things aren't happening how they are supposed with these investigators. SO I always fall back on the scripture in D&C 130:20-21. Things willl ALWAYS work out. Patience and hope... all you need to get through this life. Oh and good dose of humility. Still working on all three, and the bags under my eyes are good proof of that.
 
I know I have a whole giant genie bottle of potential, I feel like I am staring at it and my hands just won't move to rub it and let the magic out, and I think Heavenly Father is saying to me "You can do it, just think, trust, and act, you can do it" And yet I still don't lift my hands to rub the bottle. I don't want to go home because I feel like I still haven't learned what I need to in the mission. Oh es tan frustrante. pero yo tengo como 13 meses a buscar que Dios me quiere que encuentre. Nada que ver.
 
Love 
Hermana Farner

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